Self Sabotage

How many of us do this? Seriously there is no way any one of us can say we haven't given in to this monster. And that is exactly what it is! I have been thinking about this a lot lately as I journey on the weight loss wagon. While I have medical conditions that do affect my weight; what can I do to overcome some of my own bad habits. I could blame all my problems on my Severe Anxiety, my Depression, my Endometriosis and the stupid games my Thyroid likes to play on my body ( one month normal the next hypo, the next borderline- my thyroid has some serious bi-polar issues going on- not a stab at those of you with bi-polar disorder) With these come some crazy emotional train rides. I am not without the crazy.

Anyway, while I know I need to take these conditions/illnesses into consideration while working on diet, exercise, and mental/ spiritual well-being. I ought to think about those things I CAN actively work on changing that are in the self sabotaging category. A lot of the work is recognizing denial and accepting you have some weaknesses you gotta work on, but! Also making sure we develop our strengths as well. How we go about this varies per person. I am not about to give advice on how this is done. I am still trying to figure this out for myself. Individual as we are; I can't say I have any right to advise. I can, however share my thoughts.

First is thing is first. Writing down those things which you want to change and how to change them. Change always begins with you, and you alone. Granted I always suggest having a buddy system. For the longest time I let my depression take over; I was afraid to tell anyone... I may have whined and moaned, vented, you name it. But not once did I admit to myself or others I was severely depressed. Part of me was ashamed to admit this. I should have never felt this shame or been afraid to take care of my own well-being by simply stating hey I have depression, and I need your friend.

That right there is self sabotage if  you ask me! Not seeking help, not asking for it, or letting those who love you know what's up. I wish I would have spoken up sooner. So if you are silently suffering as you read this do yourself a favor, talk to someone. We can only help ourselves, our problems, our issues, our health cannot be changed until we take charge. Taking charge sucks! But I think it gets easier as you go along and have success.

So for this week I am working on rectifying some of my most horrid self sabotaging habits. One of them includes nervous/ stress eating or not eating at all. My new goal this week is to eat with purpose( for health, for my endo) and to create a schedule- I need to eat at the same time everyday or at least around the same time. Instead of putting on the pity party because the hubs is gone to Korea- mind you most of the time I pretty positive; I concentrate on our good memories and the present as best I can. But I have my moments.

I also plan on working relaxing and de-stressing. Can I call stress another one of my monsters? Stretching, Yoga, meditation, and Chakra work are in order. Maybe some crystal therapy? I have some ideas! So now I will pose the question... What are you going to do to stop self sabotage?

~Lexxy~

~Stay tuned next blog post is on Fasting- an LDS perspective~